I have an ear infection. I believe this may have been caused by an unnatural obsession with Q-tips. My normal course of action regarding any type of illness is to let it be and hope it goes away on its own, however in this case that didn't seem to be working, so yesterday (having Googled ear infections and frightened myself with the possibility of hearing loss) I caved and actually called the doctor. And then got to leave work an hour early for my appointment. But now I have an antibiotic and my ear doesn't seem to hurt as much today, although I will be spending the next week or so monitoring myself in case I turn out to be allergic to this antibiotic. Yay.
Speaking of work I have accomplished practically nothing in the past two days. I hope to at least make a feeble attempt to remedy this before leaving today.
My dad is coming up for the weekend. I'm looking forward to this and yet, for whatever reason, the weekend seems to have arrived much too quickly. Can it really be Friday already? Is he really getting here around 6 tonight? How the hell am I going to clean the bathroom, straighten up, vacuum, change my sheets, and do laundry before he arrives? It looks as though I will not be going to Curves this evening. And then there is this part of me that nags "You are never going to get in the habit of going three times a week unless you actually GO three times a week." And then it reminds me that if I had cleaned the house yesterday and/or left on time (and thus arrived on time) for work this morning, I would be out of here with plenty of time to both exercise AND tidy up before Dad arrives. And of course this makes me feel like stamping my foot and having a temper tantrum and not doing anything at all.
Need I also mention the fact that if I was not stuck at work, where I am not accomplishing anything, I would have time for all of the above and more. Oy. I think it is the fact that my boss, who is also my officemate, took both yesterday and today off. I may or may not be jealous. But mostly I think it is just that I need to learn to manage my time better. It doesn't really matter where I work, because as long as it is work I am going to dislike it simply on the basis that it is work. My work ethic is not completely nonexistant (yay double negatives) but I think it is underdeveloped, especially when compared to say, Joe. Maybe it is because I never played sports, or maybe it is my family and how I was raised, or maybe I am just too lazy to even try not to get distracted. Or maybe I just don't like what I do. But I think it is me, mostly. Even people who love their jobs do not find that what they are "supposed" to do and what they "want" to do actually match up. I guess that's just life.
My Cozumel shirt is unraveling.
I think I will say "to hell with the house" and go to Curves. For some reason that just seems more important. Although part of me thinks that I should go to the Basilica and pray. I suppose that's the same part that thinks I should go to Confession soon, but is continually unable to find the time.
I'm not PMS-y but my mood sure feels like it.
Stress?
From what? From work? From not working (or not wanting to)? From my dad coming up this weekend? From another night of being the only girl out with the guys (funny I used to like that)? From getting antsy about things I want? From playing the Sims instead of cleaning or grocery shopping for 3 weeks? From asking for Rocky Mountain Raspberry ice cream and getting Panda Paws instead? From not having gotten my mom a Mother's Day gift? From having an ear infection that's apparently infecting my brain?
Whatever it is, reading Joe's email this morning made me want to simultaneously cry and hug him forever. And all he did was wish me a good day.
Anyway, I guess I should get back to writing pointless, useless programs again.