Okay, maybe I shouldn't use the phrase "this is it" when I'm 2 weeks away from my due date, in case people get the wrong idea. But this is it for a chapter of my life -- it's my last day at work, at my desk in my office. My last day of commuting, my last day of seeing all these people, and my last regular paycheck. If I sound all wistful and melodramatic, it's just part of my personality. Change is always a struggle for me, even knowing that what's to come will be even better than what there is now. There is a sense of loss when you know things are never going to be the same. I think that's pretty natural. Last year (has it been almost a year?) I cried on my last night in my old apartment. A silly thing maybe. Obviously I was excited about getting married and starting a new life. But I think I just need to take the time to acknowledge the way things are, to appreciate how good they have been, and to "say goodbye" so to speak before I move on into the beautiful unknown. So today, "this is it" for my life as a career woman, and realizing that, I am in a wistful sort of mood.
At home, baby stuff has moved in with a vengeance this month. Until now we didn't have much, and what we did have was tossed into Bumble's room to be dealt with later. Well, later is here. Joe's mom had a shower for me a couple of weeks ago, and then the ladies of Joe's school had another one earlier this week, so I've spent the past few evenings sorting through everything, taking inventory, and deciding where to put it all. A toybox has made its way into our living room (and will soon have toys IN it instead of on and in front of it), there's a high chair by the table, a pack of baby spoons in the silverware drawer. A basket full of washcloths and bath supplies in the bathroom, hooded towels in the closet. By early next week, the ugly brown car seat will be installed in our little Ford Focus. A few more things to pick up, a few more things to put together, a few more loads of laundry to do. Everything is coming together. Maybe sometime in the next couple of weeks I'll even get my bag packed for the hospital. :-)
Completely unrelated to the rest of this post, I need to mention that I despise the phrase "baby-to-be". It is already a baby. That is all.