You might have guessed that I have been spending a lot of time on The Knot these days. I have a bit of a love-hate relationship with that site. On the one hand, it does have some useful tools, and good articles to read, especially if (like me) you're rather clueless about how to plan a wedding. On the other hand, I sometimes find it annoying. Weddings are completely over-the-top these days, and sites like The Knot completely play into that. But it does help me stay grounded in some ways, cuz I can look at all the insanity and say "well, at least I'm not doing THAT!" (Silly shows like Whose Wedding is it Anyway? are great for that too. It's a good thing I don't have cable.)
By the way, I heartily recommend Miss Manners on Weddings to anyone with a brain who gets a laugh out of things the way I do. But I love Miss Manners on any topic.
Anyway, having taken a few minutes aside to actually ponder some of the wedding details so often taken for granted these days, here are some of the sillier ones. In my mind, anyway.
Ring Bearer Actually, I think it's very sweet to have a ring bearer, a little boy (or girl) who carries the rings up to the altar on a little pillow. What I find amusing is that (from what I've read, anyway) most brides don't actually trust the ring bearer with their expensive wedding rings. Thus, the ring bearer comes up the aisle with fake rings tied to his pillow, while the best man holds the real ones. Is it just me, or does this defeat the purpose of having a ring bearer?
Bouquet Toss Again, a quaint tradition: the bride throws her bouquet to all her single friends, and the one to catch it will be the next to marry. However, most brides want to keep their bouquet as a memento of their special day, not ruin it by throwing it to a crowd of squabbling females. The solution: purchase a second, "tossing" bouquet for this festive tradition. Personally, while I can see the good intentions here, I think this one was thought up by the florists to squeeze more money out of sentimental brides.
Save the Date cards This one is supposedly all the rage according to The Knot, although I don't know whether any of my married friends had them. But the idea is this: send an announcement far in advance (6 months to a year) to your friends and family to let them know of your wedding date so that they can be sure to "save the date" and also get a jump on travel plans and reservations, if need be. Okay, call me crazy, but I wonder: if we need to send save-the-dates in order to make people aware of the date and time... then what the hell are the invitations for? (Besides, isn't it true that even without the benefit of these ludicrous save-the-date cards, pretty much everyone knows the date and time of the wedding long before the invitations go out anyway? Isn't that what parents are for?)
Anyway, that's all I have for now. Stay tuned until next time, when I continue to not rant about how much people expect you to pay for one of these shindigs.
(I've been referring to our wedding as "this shindig" a lot recently. I sort of think we should put that on the invitation. "Joe and Leslie invite you to celebrate our wedding. Please join us for a shindig after Mass." It could work.)
(Or would that go on the Save-the-Date card? :-P)